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The Epiphany of Alyeska the Epitome in Ptomaine


Mirror, mirror on the Filth Floor Bragaw shit house wall, who’s the guiltiest of thum all? Look, anybody associated with the Alyeska Pipeline Service Company during the 80s leading up to the EXXON Valdez “wreck”, remember this factoid over your senior moment hemorrhoids. The stain of that catastrophic environmental disaster of a lifetime, that which lingers on still today with the stubbornness of “stable” oil hidden away along many miles and miles of once pristine Prince William Sound shoreline, that stain belongs to Alyeska. Which means it belongs to the employer’s employees that did nothing to prevent this mess. It was not a matter of “IF” but “When”, as alcohol abuse and driving under that influence giant boats that don’t turn on a dime it don’t mix! It could have been prevented had the Alyeska management’s petrified penis…can’t speak up, as that “Shoot the Messenger” was an Alyeska trait in full force, and when one started to speak up be threatened to be thrown out of an open hatch of a pipeline helicopter! So take a bow, as if you were associated with the “Pipeline People” during that historic day in March of 89, you share the blame even if enjoying that Uncle Al “golden poop-shute parachute” in retirement. See, that stain will never go away, you cannot wash it away in denial, get over it admit it before it is too late have remorse before that graveside accommodation and we read about it in the “Alyeska Pipeline People” site, “In Memoriam” another deadhead 6-feet in defeat still in denial. See, it is all Alyeska’s fault, as there came a time in Uncle Al’s career wherein we were so damn close to enacting a rule-of-the-road in Valdez of “Hell NO”, no more drunk Joe Hazelwoods, not on our watch. Yes, we were so damn close to closing that chapter on “I abuse alcohol”. See, in 1979 a small faction a fraction of the “Valdez Marine Terminal” workforce was successful in voting in a “UNION”. It was about 10% of the site workforce that “unanimously” voted in favor of “organized labor” representation, so no big deal. And it was the “fairest” of elections ever of record the IBEW coached by the AFLCIO. And paying attention to this “Union” activity, Jesse Carr and the powerful Alaskan Teamsters. And so, everything leading up to the “vote” was up-and-up, there were no hidden guarantees or agendas with bribes and was by far the way “organized labor” elections should be held, free and clear no outside influence or pressure from arm breaking gangsters. And instead of just accepting the results of this “election” in favor of that “UNION” and letting the Alyeska “Instrument & Electrical” trade be under that “organized labor” umbrella, well it was a sick sic’em by Alyeska’s barnyard dogs in heat surrounded by the pride and joy company attorneys, to do everything and anything in their power and might with a bottomless pit source of fighting $loot$ to overthrow this election. And no way in hell would the NLRB - now sanctioned to hear Alyeska’s “appeal” in reference to Alyeska Pipeline Service Company vs. the Valdez Instrumentation & Electrical Workers, Case 19-RC-9016 - no way would this neutral government oversight cop for everything “Union” ever side with Alyeska, as that would have set a bad precedence upon “fairness” in any future unionizing activity sea to shining sea. Said again, the “IBEW” followed the book to the “T” with this election, there was nothing wrong with the way the entire process was handled and everything was done out in the “open”. So it was rather odd that Alyeska would waste time and effort for something that was done with, signed and sealed and delivered that the Valdez “I&E” was now under the auspices of a “Union”. In any event, we started making plans for our future, even though the election results in favor of a “Union” by a margin of 7 to 1 found itself under a worthless “appeal”. And our plans, well one could not complain about the existing pay with benefits, nor were complaints about the working conditions at odds as we worked a week-on with a week-off schedule and went home every night, so plenty of time to mingle with family affairs along with fishing and hunting opportunity time, so life was good why so an interest in “organized labor”? It was due to the fact there came early on after “Oil In” in 1977 a “distrust” factor, that there was a “mis-management mentality” being carried over from the main headquarters in Anchorage. That which threatened our well-being and could prove detrimental to the overall objective the main focus of the 1000-acre facility in Valdez, it was for control of the environment we called “home”. That is what we bargained for, reassurances for the future as many of us were raising families in Valdez, and in no way shape or form were the workers as residents willing to allow the environment to get trashed with “cancer causing” benzenes the byproduct of receiving 2-million barrels everyday of crude oil from up north. Yes, a “Union” oversight for assurances those reasons. Now as Alyeska fort the election results with its Peyronie “crooked dick” attorneys, we planned our future under a “UNION”. And one thing that came to light during the aftermath of the election, which had found a temporary side-track afforded to Alyeska due the NLRB “appeal” review process, it would be just a matter of time wherein that “stay away” would lose its grip and a salute to the “Union” would be ours to honor. And the fascination of “organized labor” as an outside influence that can interfere with all things considered, it was the consideration upon a “few bad apple” tanker-crews that would show up sober and then with shore-side furlough commence to get drunk, this was something that would STOP when the “UNION” charter took effect. With a little time on Alyeska’s side to be stubborn our election results, during this “appeal” process we held planning meetings to discuss the finalization of how the relationship between the “I&E” crew and Alyeska would behave, while under that “UNION” umbrella. At the time we thought it was unrealistic that Alyeska would “appeal” the workers “choice” a unanimous vote for the “UNION”, but company attorneys and outsiders make money that way, telling the Frank Turpin and George Mucus Nelson executives anything is possible - not in this case as to reiterate, the election was done by the book and the vote spoke out the desires of the workers as allowed under the Red, White & Blue! Look, it was the 1980s, and look back on the influence of the “Alaskan Teamsters” to get that 800-mile Trans-Alaskan-Pipeline built on time! Now this 25-man “UNION”, small but very powerful, as the “I&E” crew was one faction that was necessary for the proper and safe operation of the “Terminal”. Which was necessary for the operation of the “Pipeline”, as one cannot work without the other. And the “I&E”, well the Instrumentation Technicians and the Electrical Technicians, when the lights go out who you going to call? That said, it was a very powerful small footprint organization now under a “UNION”. Our plan was to bring to the attention of Alyeska executives without haste this “I abuse alcohol” problem with the tanker crews, offering up a “non-negotiable” element of surprise. What we would demand was Simple Simon, that the “Causeways” that lead from land-ahoy to the ships at the loading berth docks, these 1400-foot long “Classified Hazardous” ramps be restricted to Alyeska workers only and when an “Owner Company” agent shows up to give the blessing for a loaded tanker to set sail, that agent be escorted by an Alyeska representative. And yes so Simple Simon I reiterate, as it was already a “Restricted Zone” just went abused the first few years the "Terminal" was in operation and that is all that was required, Alyeska’s management to take sides with our concerns and deploy Alyeska’s “Terminal” Security to oversee this problem and make sure “visitors” adhered to the access restrictions. See, this would then deny the tanker crews from shore-side “furlough”. It means they would have to stay onboard doing chores when a tanker was being filled with “crude oil”, yes stuck onboard for an 11-hour duration one-hour less then the normal workday for an Alyeska employee at the “Terminal”. No big deal, if no chores catch up on sleep, do some reading, fish off the bow as salmon came right through the Berth#5 water-way and these modern ships were a luxury with pool tables and all kinds of other amenities. There was no need for that shore-side furlough except to continue on the Joe Hazelwood namesake and legacy in “I abuse alcohol”. And this was not a hardship, to restrict access along the “Causeways” and limit that shore-side leave, as the crews that came aboard the Amerada Hess ships, they did not get that shoreside “furlough” due citizenship concerns - so those crews remained onboard doing chores. Said again, restricting the tanker crews was no big deal. And if no more shore-side freewheel’n was allowed, no more “I abuse alcohol” what was becoming a common theme scene due so easy access to the town of Valdez. See, the Valdez “I&E” were getting tired of tanker crews taking advantage of that shore-side “furlough” then showing back at the “Terminal” to take control of a giant tanker filled with “toxicity” and soon heading through the Valdez “Narrows”, especially when the Yellow Cab “TAXI” showed up and once able-bodied sailors fall out of the cab and have to be carried back onboard their ships. Our plan was this, approach Alyeska with a mandate, to set new rules governing access to the “Causeways” unless for a “medical emergency”. And that desire with a time stamp, as we figured 3-months was ample time for these new restrictions to take shape and in place, else we would purposely hold a “work stoppage” in essence a “STRIKE” until such time our demands were accepted. But this was cause for concern, as the “tanker crews” worked for the “Owner Companies”, and by now Alyeska had a President with “no balls”. And that was the reason that Alyeska would fight that “Union” election tooth and nail to defeat - impossible we thought. With that, we were proud of the “UNION” drive efforts that would soon govern our future. OK, Alyeska would go way beyond just the legal side of the election in appeal, as a “SPY” had infiltrated our “UNION” shop-talk and informed the Bragaw Street executives our intentions to “STRIKE”. This was the power a handful of individuals maintained, to call for a “work stoppage-slowdown” and that could easily delay the scheduled time that a tanker disembarked. With 2-million barrels a day soon streaming down the pipeline, well if we went stubborn and tankers were delayed in and out of the Port of Valdez and with limited storage in Valdez  - about  a week’s worth of North Slope production - it meant a curtailment of the pipeline throughput. Which meant a curtailment of the Prudhoe Bay fields, and there are some wells that cannot take that kind of cutback abuse, as a producing well can lose its stamina. It meant throwing a wrench into “Big Oil’s” domain, that is the effect a handful of workers in Valdez yielded, a ways and means to curtail the entire Alaska oil trade - 21 guys and a girl knowledgeable in the aspects of the “Valdez Marine Terminal” and a facility designed in modern times that did not allow tanker loading in “manual”. It means the operation’s staffing could not move in and take over faulty equipment - so yes, dead in the water was this TAPS “End of the Line” if we placed into effect that “Slowdown” showdown. And that is what we were after, making sure thum drunk tanker crews were “dead in the water” and their ships not leaking. What a plan, and we were excited that with such power, soon enough it would try the patience and wherewithal of the Alyeska executives - either STOP the drunks or we STOP the “Pipeline”. And Alyeska was well aware of that power by a few, and the reason they decided to “SPY” and then they used their influence and political clout to sway that election to failure - after we voted for that "Union". It was castration, as the NLRB was a peace-keeping force for the “Workers” and when it made the dire straits decision in 1982 to set aside our election - yes we had been thrown under the bus of Democracy. It was crazy, and our only option was to stage another “vote”. But with the “appeal” and a set-aside granted, there was no way in hell that we would ever see “organized labor” as a representative body to help us in our concerns. It sucked, it was un-American to the point that no matter how hard we tried, there could never be another “so fair” an election and now there was “precedence set” that an “appeal” would favor Alyeska again and again and again! Which meant the “UNION” was now dead in its tracks. And Alyeska realized the repercussions of a rigged “appeal”, our merits in the “appeal” somehow sabotaged and we were pissed, as we could still cause a work slowdown. With that, Alyeska’s plan was to sabotage the “Union” supporters, displace the leaders, move people to dismantle the “Union” movement and the now growing disgruntlement after waiting 3-years for the “appeal” to screw us over - because something was not right with this outcome. Of course Congressman Don Young of Alaska was involved as were Alaskan Senators Frank Murkowski and Ted Stevens. Pressure was placed on the NLRB, our “taxpayer money” at work for the crooks! And guess what, all the time and efforts to promote this Alyeska plan of attack, well the “I Abuse Alcohol” got even worse and after Alyeska was successful in displacing the “Vocal Union Supporters” and the lawyers that made the stay of the election a mark against “Solidarity”, well who do you thing was in-line on March 24th in 1989 when Joe Hazelwood ran “Hard Aground”, as lawyers can make money on both ends! OK, besides placing the blame of that “wreck” on Alyeska, blame it also on the politics that influenced that NLRB ruling. Yes, blood on the hands of our members in Congress! So any Alyeskan still listening, this is the “True” story of what went on in Valdez. We were trying to organize for that very purpose, STOP an EXXON Valdez “wreck” from ever happening, instead Alyeska wrecked the careers of honorable men and women - and that stain is yours to enjoy forevermore the “Cowards” that were part of this Alyeska Management hoodwanking job. Think about it, castrating your very own. This is why that “Wreck” occurred, because Alyeska’s George Mucus Nelson and all his 5th Floor Bragaw cronies along with the “golden boy Bills”, a cast of clowns more thoughtful of drunk tanker crews then its own staff of dedicated workers trying to address a real  serious problem. Look in the mirror “Bills”, as there is no dedication to this kind of Ted Kaczynski madness! I was targeted for supporting the "UNION" and thrown out to the wolves, but held my ground and survived long enough to…well take the time to read “Confessions of a Turkey Baster” to see how I stuck a righteous fitting tool up Uncle Al’s rectum! And all you sick bastards that are afraid of a “UNION”, just remember that the next time the sitting U.S. President delivers that “State of the UNION” address!




Confessions of a Turkey Baster - How Alyeska Got Douched



Amazing how a $2.29 K-Mart Turkey Baster can offer up so much in prankster fun time. OK, I hear that Rolling Stones’ tune, Mother’s Little Helper and maybe, just maybe “Things are different today I hear ev’ry mother say”. Let’s hope so. But from 1985 through the end of 1988, all out attempts by the Alyeska Measurement Department’s “Masterbating Spreadsheet” fools in clown costumes found an engagement to cheat the system of merits in measurement accountability with respect to accuracy, well it was a real challenge. Especially behind any “honesty is the best policy” those dedicated salt of the earth Alyeska workers, like myself, that called out this “bluff” charge fostered by incompetency. See, during that time period, Alyeska had begun to become the “laughing stock” with the “Owner Company” Custody Transfer field auditors, as any feeble attempt to cheat-sheet the system so that Kopp’s “parallel resistors” could look good amongst themselves, well it did not mean a rat’s ass to the commodity owners. It was good for a laugh! See, any “overs & shorts” from an inaccurate measurement so “tweaked” out-of-tune to make the show & tell appear seaworthy, in the end the “Owners” lost not a drop of precious oil. As they had their own measurement systems up north in Prudhoe Bay, so relied on that “ticketing” as a final say so in the end zone. So if they sent 10000-barrels of crude oil from say the Kuparuk River field and when it hit Alyeska’s “tweakdom” Yellow Matter Custardy Transfer “skid” which then measured only 900-barrels, when it was all said and done, it was still 1000-barrels for ARCO when that stuff finally ended up at the Cherry Point refineries. The “Checks & Balances” worked, even if Alyeska’s “Measurement Clowns” tried so hard to sabotage those efforts by going against the grain of time proven standards - just follow the yellow brick road instead of a dead-end street! So looking good with this unwarranted “tweaking”, it was a self-serving “you kiss my ass and I’ll kiss your ass”…it was sick and the reason I gave up my position at Pump Station #1 as the “Custody Transfer Lead”, because changing the station’s “human waste shit bag” was more important then measuring that oil with any accuracy. I knew my days were numbered, as one day when Fat Alex “Two Chairs” showed up at the station very early one morning, I shook his naked hand with my rubber gloved hand that smelled just like his entire management staff. So for fun and no fame nor shame, I started fucking with Alyeska’s “Measurement Specialists” gurus, by sabotaging the system to see just how observant they were when things were on “Tilt”. Good thing those “Measurement Spreadsheet Masterbaters” are not engaged as bankers, even though the “Custody Transfer” is the “Cash Cow’s Cash Register”. Sad, when people get on in age never learning the know-how in kindergarten math, as for real with Alyeska’s measurement accuracy statement - half full or half empty? Talk about a five-finger discount! Here’s the deal. The tweaking, the fudge factors, this constant DCF adjustment that some guy missing a brain would send to the station technicians, well like said before the “Owner Companies” cared less about Alyeska’s “incompetence” as it hurt no-one’s interest…take that back it hurt the state of Alaska in its “Royalty” share of the “black gold”, and that is what determines that yearly PFD…mind you! So when Alyeska had me in a competitive race with respect to climbing that corporate ladder, in competition with Chris Alexander, I had to resort to sabotage in efforts to cool off “Daddy’s Little Girl’s” growth up that 5th Floor Bragaw back stairs - or back door? See, I thought I was doing everything accordingly, but was not gaining any traction on that promotional scene, which was very embarrassing! So that “Turkey Baster” became my tool of the trade against my nemesis, as I was still in charge of “oversight” on the Custody Transfer at Pump Station#1, until such time I had trained a competent staff of 4-Pipeline Technicians, then it was over with and I was to be castrated. I figured, what the fuck, as the “fudge factors” that had become routine from the “Masterbaters”, what’s the problem with a little help from a friend to fuck it up some more? And my “Rebel Without A Cause”, make sure the state’s “Royalty” share was heavy-handed on the British Petroleum side of things - to enhance that PFD handout! So with that “Baster” and every other day while I was on shift, I would take a few gulps of the “Quality Bank” sample bottle from ARCO and place it into the SOHIO canister and vice-versa and then a few squirts into the…I messed with the “Quality Bank” and the freak’n “Masterbaters” never saw it coming, for an entire year at least, I fucked with the samples - and no one ever caught onto it. The “Quality Bank”, that which represents how a commodity owner that shoves North Slope “crude oil” into the common carry TAPS finds compensation adjustments, depending on the “quality” of that oil. In fact, so complicated it is the most complicated case in litigation ever of record non-criminal court hearings. And when messed with, it is something that finds no reconciliation now that I have let the cat out of the bag! Basically, I fucked Alyeska over as it was an eye-for-an-eye tooth-for-a-tooth fairy objective - I won because I took advantage before it was taken against me. Not only that, little did the entire cast of amoeba brained “Spreadsheet Masterbaters” understand the power at my fingertips, and Alyeska messed with the wrong “thug”. See, I helped develop the “Code” for the Lisburne “Custody Transfer” metering. Which would become the standard for SOHIO and ARCO and Kuparuk and then the Endicott “Measurement Skids”. And there existed some secret codes, no one in Alyeska understood - which could be used to manipulate the number crunching and with 5-days delay in that oil running down that 800-mile Trans-Alaska-Pipeline, there was no way this “manipulation” could ever be detected. See, they were playing games in trying to balance things out, just to look super good when the mathematical concepts indicated such a complication could never balance - so when the Measurement Department’s “Spreadsheet Matersbaters” would show up at PS#1 and under-the-table hand over the DCF “tweak” factor to bring things into alignment, I would be right behind the station troops with another “Tweak“ of my own two can play the game - and it would drive thum masterbaters crazy. Knowing I was a short-timer, why not fuck UNCLE AL over the coals and I did so “Royalty” wise! I Confess…the Custody Transfer from 3/20/1989 through 12/1/1990, it was purposely messed with out of a hunch my days were numbered, yes a douche by a turkey baster - in anticipation I would get screwed over. The last laugh, as nobody ever caught on - as when the individuals responsible are too busy masterbating in schmooze, that hobnobbing ejaculation must have meant premature joy. And the “Spreadsheet Masterbaters” know TO whoM I Am Referring.


Fat Ass Alex Takes Two Chairs Challenge #2


OK, I have been asked many times why I did not advance in the Alyeska Pipeline “Organization”, as many knew me as one of the “Best of the Best” SCADA/Instrumentation/Custody Transfer Lead Technicians hired soon after “Oil In”, Valdez to Pump Station#1. Even with letters of commendation from Owner Company “Field Auditors” who witnessed my work ethics in Valdez, it did not help my future! Now I guess it was due to “competition” and I can only compare myself to a “similarly situated” Alyeska employee, wherein time of service from hire date finds comparison along with technical progression and grading on “Performance Appraisals” from our peers in supervision. So, I can only compare my time in dedication hoping-for-a-promotion with pay raise with that of “Daddy’s Little Girl”, as we started on the same damn day and so close in age and qualifications - that it will show no matter how hard I tried, there were candidates much more likely to succeed and more deserving for advancing in this Alyeska company. That said, I saw the writing on the shit-house wall, and when Alyeska’s Human Resources thought it best I attend “Basic Training” again after what President James B. Hermiller said was 11-years of “Valuable Talent” and that Alyeska benefitted from such “dedication in service”, I finally packed up my bags and left for hopefully greener pastures, as there was no way in hell I could compete in competence with “Daddy’s Little Girl”. So since many are asking “why” I had no future with Alyeska, my challenge is with “Daddy’s Little Girl”, that went from a “Technician” to “Training Department Manager” to “Pipeline Civil Maintenance Manager” to “Pipeline Construction Manager”, so valuable an asset that he skipped any supervisory "in-between the sheets" climbing, Technician to Manager. Wow, I am sure Daddy Dearest was so proud that the “blues” went away. So “Daddy’s Little Girl” was way up there on the “bar”. Be it known to all “able bodied sound in mind” that Alyeska’s BPO Ted Owens said there was a lingering “stigma” surrounding my wherewithal, and why after 11-years a determination to send me back to “Basic Training”. I mean there was nothing in my yearly performance appraisals that warranted that decision? Again, back to “Basic” and then transferred without my approval from a gainful SCADA position to that of a “Station Operator Rover”, wherein my status was reduced to Technician Level I begin it all over again. I had to get signed off on things to progress “again”, like on things that I could on my own change the Pump Station’s “Human Waste Shit Bag”. Well Ted thought something was wrong when he received my “Qualifications Matrix” from the Human Resources, which said I was rated as a 4.6er for my career - with 5.0 = "Exceptional" and 4.0 = "Well Above Average Chris" wherein a 3.0 maintains a "Meets Expectations", the of record rating which you can find below and I challenge “Daddy’s Little Girl” to show his goods that he could walk on water, to see…that nepotism was alive and well in the Alyeska organization and when a company resorts to this kind of preferential treatment, no different then that stench from a sewage treatment plant on overflow! So Chris, show US your ratings!




The Uncle Al WAR Years


It was in September of 1979, wherein I would witness firsthand that “Racism is an ally of Fascism”. OK, we all know what that “racism” means, and here is the “Kids Definition” of Fascism: a system headed by a dictator which controls labor and opposition is not permitted. Pretty Simple Simon! Especially that labor control, supported by a posse of henchmen cowitts used against any opposition, especially if “organized labor” is involved. Yes, between 1979 and 1982, under the dictatorship of George M. Nelson, Alyeska existed as a “Fascist” organization when it came to “opposing” any representation under that UNION flag. Back to my beginning the “Uncle Al WAR years”, as I became a victim to Nelson’s lynching. Upon wherein this “Fascism” and its ally in “Racism” was allowed, approved by the executives of the 5Th Floor of Bragaw. 

It was soon after hire with the Alyeska Pipeline Service Company, wherein I would sense what I was getting into was questionable - but don’t judge a book by its cover not just yet! Yes, a coveted job with the Trans-Alaska-Pipeline, as one of thum there “Pipeline People”. It meant a good paying job with unmatched benefits, wow that “golden handshake” in retirement some 40-years away was looking good time to raise a family. Upon that hire, I had my marching orders and was standing 3rd in line at the Pump Station#5 “Pipeline Training Academy,” when Will the instructor was quick witted to diffuse what appeared to be some racial tensions between “Daddy’s Little Girl” and Frank Yasuda the Athabaskan. For real, as Will was assigning rooms and partners for the next two weeks of training, “Daddy’s Little Girl” made it clear and convincing out loud that he would not partner up with an Alaskan Native - especially when doubling up meant a room-mate! So I became “Daddy’s Little Girl’s” partner. Sad, that the bigot was not fired on the spot, but we would soon learn the reasons that the training staff referred to this bigot as “Daddy’s Little Girl”. I don’t need to go any further the details, the bigot knows who I’m talking about, southern drool and coddled through his career as…well “Daddy’s Little Girl”. And was the way in which instructor Will diffused that situation so soon and witnessed by a bunch of new hirers, just water under the bridge? It was a cover-up, as I would become friends with Frank as we were both assigned to the pipeline in Valdez. He would never forget that day and went to his grave remembering that dishonor, as the bigot continued to advance in the company - and not due dedication but who you know maybe who you blow. But soon dispatched down to Valdez following that “Training”, the workers were confronted with another problem - skunk drunk tanker crewmembers that lived by the motto: “I abuse alcohol”. So we fought that locally and beyond within the company and since the Alyeska management sought to disregard our concerns, well it appeared to be akin to that same cover-up the bigotry “Daddy’s Little Girl” but a much bigger problem. See, those drunks worked for the “Owner Company”, that which exists in a trickle-down like “fascism” control over Alyeska. So Uncle Al bent over and instead of fixing the problem, it instead tried to silence our efforts - to be heard we did not like drunk captains getting aboard a fully laden tanker with millions of barrels of crude oil and driving such monsters through Prince William Sound. We know what that would mean, like in March of 1989 with the EXXON Valdez wreck. So last resort, way before that historical “Wreck” because the Alyeska management did nothing with this tanker crew mischief as they thought a little drinking on the job was kids play, well we thought we needed protection outside of that Alyeska management and started an “organized labor” movement. And that is when the Alyeska “Fascism” to oppose our labor movement surfaced in full force. Alyeska, instead of just addressing the “Driving Under the Influence” by “Owner Company” tanker crews calling on the Valdez Marine Terminal, it resorted to “Kill the Messenger”. Between 1979 and 1982 an all-out effort to silence and kill our “organized labor” attempts, because here is what the “Fascists” were afraid of our efforts gaining traction. And remember, all the resources spent on attacking the workers concerned over the fact that with the “I abuse alcohol” it was not a matter of “IF” but “WHEN”, that resigned resources away from the real problem! A UNION win in Valdez with a handful of workers could trend like a cancer and grow. A handful of Valdez workers, those that were confronted with this “I abuse alcohol” syndrome from visiting tanker crews and sick and tired over having too close to fist-fight confrontations with this “I had too much to drink last night” gang while we were just trying to do our jobs, we won an election to go “UNION”. It was then that Alyeska set its sites not on the problem, but on that “UNION”, to oppose and that strategy fits right in with the true definition of Fascism. See, that concerted effort to be represented by outside influence in a “UNION”, that would have placed a screeching halt on that “I abuse alcohol” and the EXXON Valdez wreck would have still been merely something of a possibility but not a reality. When we won that “UNION”, one strike-walk-out by the ”Instrumentation & Electrical” crew, hey we kept the lights on - get the point? But instead, it was a plan to “Kill the Messenger” and an all-out WAR began, to overturn that election. See, with the “Union” getting its foot in the door, the Teamsters were ready to support the entire 800-mile pipeline going UNION, and things like “Daddy’s Little Girl” would soon be in the unemployment line instead of getting preferential promotional treatment all through a career, as Daddy would have been canned. And once the pipeline went “UNION”, it would be but a matter of time wherein the entire Alaskan oil scene would be under the “umbrella” of the “Teamsters”. And when the USA was receiving 20% of its crude oil requirements from this Alaskan trade to fuel the economy, it was a very powerful sign for the “UNION” growth in America. So the “Fascism” started in earnest its retaliation to break our concerted efforts. And with Alyeska it meant a campaign to illegally "SPY" on the Valdez workers, to find out who was supporting this “organized labor movement” and deny any promotions and…well that picture is worth a thousand words what it meant for the dedicated workers, who did their jobs and went above and beyond to try and STOP this “Daddy’s Little Girl” syndrome. There was no way in hell, as “Fascism” was alive and well. And when I look back at my first introduction with the “Daddy’s Little Girl” syndrome, and then was made aware by our own “Spy” that Alyeska had targeted me as a “vocal UNION supporter” which meant “black listed” and never going anywhere, I quit! As "This Machine Kills Fascists” and I am with Woody all the way! We tried, had the Alyeska “management” under George Mucus Nelson listened to our concerns, the pain and suffering that has endured the EXXON Valdez “wreck” in reputation - well Frank went to his grave with the reminder that “Daddy’s Little Girl” bigotry lives on!


Dedication: George Mucus Nelson, APSC President 1989

To all of the Alyeska Pipeline Service Company employees that were part of the “management mindset” back in 1989 that did “NOTHING”, let me emphasize, did “NOTHING” when the Valdez “I&E” Technicians complained in a force majeure protest about the “Drunk Tanker Crews” sabotaging the peace & tranquility of our work place. And in dedication such management dereliction on the soon to be 31st anniversary of Joe Hazelwood’s “Hard Aground” pounding, a theme song for your dedication to castrate humanity in a “Not Give a Rat’s Ass” attitude. Take that back, that “management mindset” was not asleep at the wheel, as George Mucus Nelson’s “sheep” instead targeted those trying to STOP those Joe’s that admitted: “I Abuse Alcohol”.

Alyeska's Management at Work!


Now believe me when I tell you that my song is really true
I want everyone to listen and believe
It's about some little people from a long time ago
And all the things the neighbors didn't know Early in the morning
Daddy Dinky went to work
Selling lamps & chairs to San Ber'dino squares
And I still remember Mama with her apron & her pad
Feeding all the boys at Ed's Cafe!
Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day
(Ronnie helping Kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
KENNY'S LITTLE CREATURES ON DISPLAY!
Ronnie saves his numies on a window in his room
(A marvel to be seen: dysentery green)
While Kenny & his buddies had a game out in the back:
LET'S MAKE THE WATER TURN BLACK
We see them after school in a world of their own
(To some it might seem creepy what they do...)
The neighbors on the right sat & watched them every night
(I bet you'd do the same if they was you)
Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day
(Ronnie helping Kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
KENNY'S LITTLE CREATURES ON DISPLAY!
Ronnie's in the Army now & Kenny's taking pills
Oh! How they yearn to see a bomber burn!
Color flashing, thunder crashing, dynamite machine!
(Wait till the fire turns green...
Wait till the fire turns green)
WAIT TILL THE FIRE TURNS GREEN!
 Songwriters: Frank Zappa

The Two Chairs “Nepotism” Challenge

“Daddy, daddy the "True Grit Pipeline Workers" are picking on me again, wawawawaa...daddy, daddy I soiled my diaper again, wawawawaa...daddy, daddy...the "True Grit Pipeline Workers" are calling you names...they say you are a fat asshole, wawawawaa...daddy, daddy, I don't like changing the shit-bag, can I be "Training Manager", please, wawawawaa...daddy, daddy, I don't like that "Training" job, I want to play in the road mud, wawawawaa...daddy, daddy can I have another job...daddy, daddy...wawawaa, daddy, daddy, I soiled my diaper again..." 


Feedback(1) from ex-Alyeska Employee: Look, out of a bonafide disrespect, Harold “Two Chair’s” Alexander was a piece of scat and the way he coddled that sonny boy of his for so many years, wherein promotions were someone else’s that deserved an advancement…what a freak’n joke! And everybody was afraid of sonny boy, because of daddy dearest.
Feedback(2) from Alyeska Employee: You talking Chris? Right on, a real scum-bag.
Feedback(3) from ex-Alyeska Employee: I have feedback to Feedback#1, Chris was the real piece!
Feedback(4) from ex-Alyeska Employee: Nepotism 101, but I think there was a bull-cook that changed sonny’s soiled diapers when Two Chairs was double-fisted busy with donut call.
Feedback(5) from ex-Alyeska Employee: Not the bull-cook, it was the station manager…
Feedback(6) from ex-Alyeska Trainer Coordinator: Baby never finished “Basic Training”. I remember, he was partnered with one of Alyeska’s top-notch technicians - that Mike Kelley. But they figured out a way to send Kelley back to basic, many years after - maybe to finish up for the baby. That’s how the Two Chair’s nepotism worked, no responsibility let other do the dirty work.
Feedback(7) from ex-Alyeska Employee: I was that female in the picture, a pipeline worker. That kid was like father like son, useless.
Feedback(8) from ex-Alyeska Employee: I vote for 2 to be taken off Alyeska Pipeline People site!
Feedback(9) from ex-Alyeska Employee: 4th generation oil field worker? Dear Chris, you & pa were far from oil field workers, maybe oil field trash. In fact, after I left Alyeska I went to work as a roustabout in Prudhoe Bay - you would have lasted maybe to breaktime!
Note: Feedback is very rarely published, but in this case it is good for the laughs. Also, there was some “Feedback” that could not be posted, due the content on this subject.

It’s a Family Affair…Blood, is thicker then mud…


OUI OUI Monsieur! As many retired Alyeskans travel the world over enjoying the fruits of thou labors and not yet in RIP mourning, as so advertised in the news found in the “Alyeska Pipeline People” keep-in-touch website, the “Oui Oui” may transcend as a fashionable treatise. Heads up on that “wee wee” what it means in the Alyeska Pipeline Service Company’s - TAPS Glossary. For many “ex” Alyeska escapees, it means “Operating Under the Influence” or for lack of a better definition, aka “pissing on decency” the salt of the earth hard working brothers & sisters in “Solidarity". When “Best of the Best” was realigned to "Best in the Beast" and who could bring news about employees trying to “Unionize” fastest to the HR cunts, even if that information was false, gonna climb the corporate hoe ladder! Now that fromunder “Influence” can take on a dirty-dozen influence, that baker’s-dozen the 13th donut at odds, man out of bounds with humanity - but let’s stick with the urination factor. See, when the dedicated workers in Valdez sought representation by “organized labor” in the early 80s, it wasn’t about working conditions upon the job description or the lack of a competitive wage with benefits nor the time-off as all was good in that worker as laborer & management as boss “dominion”! The call to “Unionize”, it was all about them drunked up tanker crews returning a little too tipsy from that shore-side furlough, as their mighty EXXON Valdez tankers went filled with crude oil. Then they would jump aboard the helm of those beastly boats and pedal-to-the-metal joy ride out of town. Well one early morning, Captain Joe went asleep at the wheelhouse and missed a turn and the rest was history. And that TAXI driver that delivered the drunks back to that pirate ship, well too bad Mr. Yellow-Matter-Custard didn’t miss that last turn on Dayville Road and dunked the drunks into the bay “man overboard”, as that would have sobered the bastards up. Wow, and Joe’s apology; “Yes, I abused alcohol”! But at the same time, some 800-miles north, well that second verse same as the first in this “OUI” was roustabouting out-of-place some Peacock feathers. See, before Captain Joe went reckless, I was on my way up to Pump Station#1 - after an ARCO field measurement auditor caught wind that the “Custody Transfer” at Mile Post “0” was messed up and needed some outside attention. I was working for Alyeska at the “Valdez Marine Terminal”, and from here to there they could not find anybody qualified in between to…well to bail Alyeska out. OK, the truth-in-lending what caused failure. The guy we booted from Valdez somehow or another schmoosed his way back into “Oil Measurement” fame, as by now in Alyeska’s history ass kissing schmoozing your way to the top was the new game on the “Bragaw Street” block. Credibility was lack-a-billy, southern drool! Maybe it was the George M. Nelson disease, “M” as in “mucous”. Yes, “Corporate Ass Kissing” 800-miles long and lucky for us in Valdez, well we didn’t need the bastards, we didn’t want the bastards, and we wanted that “Union” to help defend against that wayward assassination and dereliction in sabotage upon decency that was coming our way from Bragaw. Love it or live it, Alyeska was three different companies - “Un” the pipeline run by a fat asshole they called “Two Chairs” that continued to coddle an adult son like a baby in diapers and “Trois” with Valdez, wherein for awhile “We the Workers” ran the show along with front-line managers like Lynn McArthur who gave a rat's ass. The reason we could tell the Joe Hazelwoods to get fucked and raise a fist in solidarity, take that back, raise a RIGID 818 in solidarity and were not afraid to brawl. And behind door Number “Deux”? Bragaw Street, the reason it was Number 2 no further explanation required. So here I was, stepping into the “Two Chairs” domain. Anyway, I am checked in for that “Conair” flight north, the Alyeska ERA charter. I didn’t know anybody, didn’t matter as those of us in Valdez, well we didn’t need to prove nothing to nobody. The Pump Stations were like “kid toys” in comparison to what we were responsible for in Valdez. But at least Pump Station#1 was in nearsightedness some semblance of a complicated system, used to pump that oil south. OK, in the numbers game of chance in the “complication” scheme of things from the “Start” to the “End”, about 1/50th as sophisticated! So my task at hand, it would be a piece of cake, just get out of my way. Soon and without any announcements, the flight departure time had been delayed. Weather in Deadhorse? No, as sunshine and calm winds reported. Mechanical delay? No, as “Crash Harvey” was willing and waiting at the stick. It was like whatever the holdup, it was all on the “hush hush” and I wasn't getting paid! I then noticed a few Alyeska station personnel assembling and discussing something in a closed-fashion secrecy: “Because something is happening here but you don’t know what it is, do you Mr. Jones”. Then a few guys in a hurry up like manner exit the concourse and jump into a taxi and then another taxi, and head out. Good, I'll go back home to Valdez. I started to eavesdrop, something about searching the Anchorage bars for a no-show, a guy named Cal. In about an hour’s time, the recovery team makes it back, and in drag some guy that looks like he spent the last week with Captain Joe on 2nd Avenue in Fairbanks. Talk about hush, but soon we were airborne. Funny thing, this was the “normalcy”? Now when we get to Deadhorse then onto the Station PLQ camp, this Cal character was carried off the Alyeska bus and taken to his bunk. Like clockwork, a routine practiced like it was pipeline recon training everybody knew what to do - just in this case keep your damn mouths shut. Then it was all like a nothing-burger, nobody spoke up or about this event - business as usual. WTF was my sentiment, but don’t ask don’t tell seemed to be in effect and I did not give a rat’s ass. I didn’t really care - not my problem and had seen the same damn disrespect in Valdez - the “coverup” and I had a job to do. I proceeded to look into the “Custody Transfer” and why an “Owner Company” oversight was complaining. Boy, was I not wanted, not disdain by the troops, but the supervisory goons and some ass-wipe named Joe Hirer that was in charge of the “roads & pads” giving me shit in the hallway! Was it supposed to be as fun? Not to worry, never leave home without it, my RIGID! It was to be expected, as someone from Valdez was considered an outsider, especially if at the station to work on the most critical aspect of this TAPS - the “Custody Transfer”. It’s what the “Bean Counters” relied upon and it was well known “if you can’t measure it don’t pump it”. Look, I wasn’t sent here for a hangover sleep-off, so I jumped right into the issues at hand - inaccurate measurement of the crude oil commodity at the begining of the pipeline. See, we had everything in Valdez dialed in to an accuracy statement “unsurpassed” and if a balance problem with the “Ins & Outs” equation was cause for concern, it meant one of two things. A messed up “Custody Transfer” at Pump Station#1 or a leak somewhere along that 800-miles of pipe in the Alaskan wilderness. So it was serious business. And we were confident is wasn’t a leak, more in-line to a continuation of the “jokerman” mentality that allowed “tweaking”, make it look good on the surface. Said again, we ran the “Measurement Masterbaters Anonymous” out of Valdez a long time ago. As by this time with Alyeska and the “asshole kissing” contest in Anchorage, the entire stewardship in professionalism with the oil measurement responsibility went gutted, MarKoppal Tweaker Syndrome to the rescue, to make it look good nothing more - as much of it was now in control by the “Spreadsheet Masterbater” enthusiasts who had taken over and…it was a mess and in no way shape or form could this be part of any legitimate pipeline “leak detection” system. So I reported that back to the ARCO field agent and the very next day that “Custody Transfer” was taken away from the Peacock and SCADA moved in to Pump Station#1 for the long term. Not that I was that good of a trouble-shooter so quickly, the fucking local moron "stand your guard" bragged that the station was told to “tweak” the flow computers everyday, and once that starts you chase your tail forevermore. Look, it is the “$Cash Register$” and when is doesn’t balance at close of business, someone’s got their mitts in the “cookie jar”! But that was the same damn problem we were witnessing in Valdez with the “OUI”, when Alyeska’s “management mindset” started sending rejected cowards from the “pipeline” out-to-pasture in Valdez and instead of fixing problems, focusing on a “silence & kill the messenger” mandate. It was that “mucous”, it sticks! Now I see wherein it came from, as when a cesspool overflows those floaters flow downhill. So here I was stuck for a week and about 3-days into my PS#1 vacation, that guy Cal shows up for the “morning meeting”. I was surprised he was still with the company…he was the freak’n “Supervisor”? OUI OUI Masterbaters! And that is why the crew change plane was late with “wheels up”, as the station supervisor must OK the delivery of the fresh crew! Can’t do that when you are AWOL, have another drink! And that meant wasting "my time", off the clock waiting for Joe Hazelwood to make a show. But by this time in Alyeska’s history, when George Mucous Nelson was at the “helm”, it was too damn late for Alyeska to change course as in “horses in midstream”, as all “ethical reasoning” was gone in  the prevailing winds of change. Change can be good, not in this case. The “Union” was busted, and if you ever wonder how a tanker can run “Hard Aground”, Alyeska's coward “management” was already hard-on “grounded” and it was merely a “monkey see monkey do” mentality for survival. If the Alyeska management could get away with “OUI” so could we many took that offering to heart. Within a few weeks of my reporting back to my boss in Fairbanks, SCADA took over the entire “Custody Transfer” from the Peacock. That was a mandate from an “Owner Company”, get a team in there that knows what the hell they are doing. See, not only was it crucial for accuracy, this is wherein the State of Alaska received its “Royalty” share of this Prudhoe Bay “cash cow” - and yes every drop of oil counts as does every red cent penny when it comes to the bottom-line. I once witnessed an “Owner Company” field agent go crazed over the fact an oil analyzer at PS#1 had been repiped without permission to discharge its spent oil into the “mainline”, but after the metering - so it was “unmeasured oil”. We had to set up an elaborate test to measure how much oil was lost in a day, it amounted to a barrel a week and the ticket receipts had to be corrected to add that loss. Yes, add a single barrel to millions. Oil is oil! And our SCADA presence on the scene, that pissed off the local management like with man panties to damn tight. We were like the “Goodfellas” as our boss in Fairbanks played the Bragaw Street game very brilliantly like a Paul Cicero villain - as this “Custody Transfer” stuff was a gimme shelter ace in the hole. And nobody came close to how we ran the store, to the point we were asked by affiliated “Owner Companies” to help get their goods up to speed on the North Slope. Sad thing, the “Oil Measurement” misfits in “Masterbation” maintained their Bragaw Street jobs, as when that disconnect occurred with the 5th Floor “Executives”, one could survive just by doing drive by ass kissing. Regardless, we continued to maintain what the boss told us to do, and he had our backs. We were our own boss at site and never went to shift change, had our own trucks and got passes to eat over at the BP Hilton. Worked a “split shift” so we didn’t have to ride that dingey old “Conair” special slow-poker, and to boot flying commercial at Alyeska’s expense and getting air miles for free trips. When things went hairy around the station, we would get in our trucks and head south - yes our SCADA trucks were equipped with fishing poles and tackle. And because we kept those systems maintained so well, fishing was our reward, playing hooky from the station and too damn bad if it gave Migraine Rick the fits and his ever damning displeasure that SCADA was out-of-control. I guess in fact like the "Untouchables". And because SCADA’s presence at Pump Station#1 was dictated by an “Owner Company”, so what if Alyeska considered it “outside interference”, there was not a damn thing Two Chairs could do about it - when even his bible thumping sympathy for the devil sermons failed to do justice.  For real, Two Chairs calls me into Rick's office one day and asks me to repent. Hey Alex, don't you have some diaper changing to do down at Station#5? But likewise how the Alyeska 5th Floor Bragaw would turn away from decency and then be known as the Filth Floor Bragaw, all good things come to an end such was our dedication squashed, after a 5-year reign. So we won, the bastards lost. And I wonder, are the “Spreadsheet Masterbaters” at it again, tweaking things so it looks good? Maybe the reason in 2001 a bullet-hole through that pipeline - another drunk taking target practice - it leaked oil for way too long. And maybe if the “leak detection” went into alarm during this incidence, just tweak it back to hibernation - the Alyeska pride & joy ride fantasy of doing things right and I was never in it to kiss another executive’s ass! It is called the short-timer syndrome. And the Filth Floor Bragaw "golden boys"...take that back the "golden shower boys" that would do anything to climb that Nelson hoe corporate ladder, sad fact of humanity. In ending, a whole lot of them “retirees”, no matter how far they get away from Alaska be damned, the “stink-finger” from corporate digital rape remains and those on the run, just “take a whiff, take a whiff, take a whiff on me, everybody take a whiff on me”!

Charles Hamel - Alyeska’s Hannibal Lecter


I was just re-visiting a correspondence - entered as “written testimony” under oath - between Charles Hamel and the 100th U.S. Congress, before the Committee on Energy and Natural Resources. Yes, retirement finds a whole lot of slack time to re-visit that “person of interest” when the fish ain’t biting. It was back from 1987 wherein Hamel Hannibal sweet-talks cheat-talks about how the destructive Valdez Technicians “ate the heart” of John Zink. I am talking the Thermal Oxidizers, a main component of the “Vapor Recovery System” required as part of the TAPS “Operating Permit”. In the early 80s, I along with my Alyeska co-workers in dedication went responsible for the proper operation of that somewhat complicated “pollution control device”. At least from the standpoint of the “Instrument & Electrical Department’s” oversight jurisdiction, when under the “Hoss” Lynn McArthur as a “Best of the Best Boss”. OK, it was “complicated” only until such time we found an understanding behind the dynamics at play, after that just a piece of cake. The Valdez Technicians under McArthur, well we got real good at our jobs keeping pace this 1000-acre almost $1-Billion infrastructure layout that attracted millions of barrels of oil from up North, as that was the Hoss’ expectations. There was no other option, as his management style dictated such with a mile long smile. The system worked as designed, when we figured out the “Three Square Ts” of heat exhaustion “oxidation” a little different then pure engine “knock-knock” who’s there combustion in “Time, Temperature and Turbulence”. Got that? And once there was enough pipeline “Throughput”, it was then time to fully “commission” the mission of this all-important environmental device designed by Fluor Engineering. Matter in fact, it worked admirably to annihilate 99.999% of the hydrocarbon vapors taken away from the 18-crude oil storage tanks, from natural “breathing” and pipeline upset “burps”, so it worked under all conditions normal to abnormal what more could you ask for in a control scheme. We could monitor that atmospheric flight in hydrocarbon vapor “annihilation” with temporary “air quality monitoring” probes stuck into the stacks of these “beasts” during the alignment phase. On a comparison, that almighty destruction of unburned “light end” residuals - all part of the crude oil transportation desires - it was less wear and tear upon the air we breathe then that which would promote choking through a bad “inversion” day in interior Fairbanks, during a bastardly cold winter’s day. When the authorities would warn health vulnerable citizens to stay indoors, due the vapors from engines running below par for the course. I lived in Fairbanks, I choked. I lived in Valdez, and never once choked. And about halfway through Hamel’s “half wracked truths” on a subject his matter expertise guilty of “fraud” and provided to a gullible U.S. Congress, when you read between the lines here is what this menace was really trying to say:

“A CENSUS TAKER ONCE TRIED TO TEST ME. I ATE HIS LIVER WITH SOME FAVA BEANS AND A NICE CHIANTI.”


Charles Hamel, Alaska’s “pain in the ass” that would align himself with “bigots” and other disgruntled Alyeska workers in efforts to forward hoe that “sweet-talking cheat-talking” guy thing. Using others to get even with a nemesis. And he tried to draft me for his pathetic chastising of “Big Oil” in Alaska, not because he was a “True Environmentalist”, but due failed $$$$ competition with that “Big Oil” upon his interests in North Slope leases. He was an “Oil Man” an “Oil Broker”, not some wannabe John Muir or Al Gore with a cause! Split personality? Anybody that thinks Charles “Chucky” Hamel was an environmentalist, for creepy dolls sake there is a place awaiting your arrival - it’s called the Trans-Allegheny-Lunatic-Asylum. How he ever convinced the Congress of “My Country ‘Tis of Thee” that he was an environmentalist “gadfly”, it is sick! Yes, Hamel Hannibal tried to frame me for his entertainment reality stage in fame, because I was “black-listed” by Alyeska due a trumped up charge that I was a “Vocal Union Supporter”, forever sidetracked by Alyeska’s Human Resources for any and all career promotions. And I knew where the “skeletons” were well hidden, as in the late 70s the “Vapor Recovery System” was, for awhile, in a total state of disrepair. When “bomb samples” taken due malfunctioning equipment and operational handicaps lacking in understanding how things were supposed to work, such a weakness allowed 3000-BTU gas to perspire from the 550000-barrel crude oil storage tanks. Yes, like BIC Lighter fuel - because the control system to properly enable the “vent and inert” loading on those storage tanks was broke. We fixed it and then we were successful in taming that “Beast”, when that once upon-a-time highly explosive gas was turned downwards and settling in at 400-BTUs of nothing, or what was called “Waste Gas” and so easily destroyed to carbon dioxide and water vapor. See, Hamel Hannibal thought that John Zink was his very own “Buffalo Bill”, that “sphinx moth” calling card his hostages “squeak”. Hamel went disgruntled when “good news” surrounded his sabotage attempts against “Big Oil” like a John Wayne posse surrounding those covered wagons of outlaws - as anybody that aligned himself or herself with this lunatic, it was sad and still sick. Said again, he was an independent “OIL BROKER” and an “OIL MAN”! And thus his character took on that “split”, as now Hannibal was losing out as one cannot compete against such Tiger “might” and so disgruntled started a vendetta to get even. Through a network, he drafted people that could help with one thing, his own personal objective - get even at any cost. Those that set foot in his arena, there was nothing in it for themselves, just a pompous self-serving SOB that relished in using others for his advantage. So he started a grudge match, and invited some of Alyeska’s worst of the worse technicians to help in that pursuit, like Bigot Bob and Miracle Barrel Pollyanna. Hamel aligned himself with “filth” and since he had friends in Congress that “foot in the door”, set out to discredit what we did for a living working for Alyeska, mind you in dedication we performed our duties. I was raising a family in Valdez, and no way in hell would I subject my family to destructive pollution like Mr. Lecter tried so hard to entertain in misery what his rat fink posse thought was going on with the “Vapor Recovery System”. And even award-winning “writers” paid tribute to Hamel Hannibal’s deceiving in a Louis Friend friendship, writing “fool’s gold” articles that found no merit in journalism. I would say that an interview with Hamel was no different then when Clarice braved being a hostage to Hannibal’s mental mindset in quid pro quo. Take the Anchorage Times’ Ortega’s penmanship, while using Charles Lecter provided “stolen property” like the Alyeska Operational “log-books”, to try in vain and make heads over tails what it means in “operation’s lingo” which is written in a code. That the John Zink was only “fully operational” for 2-days in a month or 1-day in 5 and for 8-years since “Oil In” has allowed 40-tons each hour to be carried away in the clear blue skies over the “Sound”. Dear Mr. Newsman Ortega, “REMARKABLE BOY. I DO ADMIRE YOUR COURAGE. I THINK I’LL EAT YOUR HEART.” 

Look, in this case downtime means success! Because when we succeeded in re-aligning the system so that rocket-man gas was no longer produced from irate valves opening prematurely and sucking vapors off of the tanks, instead it allowed for a “float” zone in tranquility as was per the design specifications. With that, there was no need but for 2-Zink stacks to be in operation at any given time, with a manageable 60% load factor. And believe me, not once when this system was fine-tuned by our dedication in obligation, not once in 4-years did a storage tank have to rely on its pressure relief valves, as that is when shit can roam the atmosphere unaccounted for. And when all was working, it allowed for maintenance time the unit out-of-service. What a brilliant concept, “Downtime” and something no bird brain idiot could or would understand! That is how things are supposed to work. Any dip-shat that reads Hannibal Lecter’s lecture to Congress, and takes it to heart - that heart is missing. Said again, our efforts to make sure idiots like Charles Hamel stayed far and away, we made things work and this is when the pipeline’s throughput was maximized! WTF is wrong with these experts that took Hamel Hannibal’s advice and made friction for Alyeska?  The sad fact, Alyeska’s very own environmental engineers went along with Lecter, because they were out of touch what was happening in Valdez. They were all wrong, and when Hamel’s frontal lobotomy assault seemed to be loosing steam and soon to be “water under the bridge” his Lecter grip, his posse of misfits would purposely cause the pollution systems to malfunction - and send smoke signals to the DEC police who was also on the take with Hamel! It was a coordinated effort, to make Alyeska look bad which made the workers look bad. And that is what I could not stand down upon and stood up for - even if it meant the “threat” of “organized labor” to protect our interest in raising families in Valdez without the risk of our growing kids getting some type of weird “benzene” cancer. The freak’n madness with this Hamel character showing a true Hannibal Lecter personality, it was scaring our families, in pure nonsense. In time, Hamel’s push & shove through others aiding & abetting this enemy, it was not gaining much traction trying to take on the EXXONs. He lost, with his interest in those oil leases he held in partnership a very limited percentage - like in the Lisburne pay zone, which was a difficult formation to produce from so was a slow poke to come up to a desirable production. “Big Oil” knows the business in Alaska, why waste time and energy and effort to roto-rooter a stubborn formation when across the street there is a more vibrant pay zone - one that Hamel was not associated with. Save the tough stuff for that rainy day, and that is what was causing Hamel’s disingenuous “swine flu” epidemic that affected some Alyeska workers and went as far as influencing members of this nation’s very own Congress - like George Miller and John Dingell. So Hamel’s dream of being part of the “Big Oil” club, like speculation to a judge and was merely an opportunity in “fool’s gold”. This Hamel Hannibal disease went on for some 4-years before the EXXON Valdez “Wreck”, so what does that have to do with anything? When failure was dominating that pursuit to get even with EXXON, Hamel Hannibal then aligned himself with Radio Ralf, that “Buffalo Bill” character in “The Silence of the Lambs”. I had talked with Hamel’s lawyers and associates that were by his side like a side-arm that barrel bent 180-degrees - shoot yourself in the foot, just playing the game so I could get an understanding of not only where is this guy coming from, but how far would he go before that Hannibal Lecter kicked in and real harm was done? Now Radio Ralf was a brilliant man, that understood radio communications and navigational stuff and all that “hocus pocus” wave-theory. He once worked for Alyeska, but was supposedly terminated because suspicion he was messing with the Remote Gate Valves “Transit Codes”. These “radio controlled” valves in the “hundreds” run the 800-mile long “pipeline” and used to isolate the “mainline” in a coordinated effort, as there is a method to the madness to slow down all that momentum from the pumping stations and mountain elevation changes, which can sock-it-to-me knock-your-socks-off with that oil front if out-of-control. And a “valve” closing “Un-Commanded & Out-of-Sequence” in the middle of the “wilderness” no time to dispatch help, that could wreck-havoc on the integrity of the line. Yes, the “Codes” had been compromised. The reason that “Crowbar” was installed at some of the critical RGVs, in the pass-over critical elevations wherein the “head” if out-of-control could airborne the pipeline off of its rocker. A “Crowbar”, fancy term for a control system to short-circuit the electrical drive fuses and STOP a valve traveling “CLOSED” in its tracks. Now Radio Ralf caught wind that I was one or was willing to become one of Hamal Hannibal’s “stoolges”, as there was a mole amongst the troops in Valdez passing around false information in efforts to play that 5th Floor Bragaw “Corporate Poop Shoots & Ladders” game for fame. For this guy any affiliation with Hamel, far from the fact just the other way around, as I was using the failed “Oil Broker” for my own advantage - as it was a time when “who can you trust” was vacated. Look, Alyeska “Executives” were “Spying” on the workers due Hamel Hannibal’s craving for “fresh meat”, my mugshot had a dart where it counts! I was targeted because of my knowledge of what went on in Valdez, not only with the “Vapor Recovery” any early on shortcomings, but all the critical infrastructure systems, including the “Causeway” breaching by drunk tanker crews returning from freewheelin’ furloughs. Anyway, I get invited down to Radio Ralf’s “Man Den” in Valdez, out at the Robe River subdivision. No, not your typical “Man Den” with a refrigerator filled with beer and a “Big Screen”, but all kinds of radio equipment filling every nook’n cranny wall-to-wall, looked like a NASA lab. Hand-held radios, digital modems, like Radio-Shack central! And I always wondered about all the aerial antennas on the roof of this place, especially the reason for the “high-gain” directional YAGI pointing in the secondary-intercardinal-direction of WSW - or an area covering the Alyeska “Marine Terminal”, the Valdez Narrows and  on extended reach, the Tatitlek passage which includes “Bligh Reef”. This was Radio Ralf’s “at home employment” enjoyment after Alyeska. And before my very eyes and astonishment, it was demonstrated from a remote location “cellar” how a knowledgeable radio man could interfere with the navigational systems in Prince William Sound, around that “Narrows’” passageway? This was a time wherein technology, in its new age fame in infancy, such was starting to be “integrated” with mainframe computers and more and more “networking” capabilities. At the time, I did not know what to make of this as maybe this was just another disgruntled ex-employee showing off, that there was life after Alyeska as his job was just that, making sure the navigational equipment on the outbound tankers was working properly. And with far reaching technologies, all done from “remote” the comfort of that “Man Den” and no need entering the “Terminal” through security - especially if an “ex” had been banned a “security clearance” due past suspicious activities! For real, radio access “codes” to the guts of what keeps those tankers from going off-course!  But Ralf also understood what “We the Workers” were up against with our organized “Union” drive efforts. At the same time an understanding upon our frustration with the “Drunk Tanker Crews” that which violated our dignity at the Alyeska “Marine Terminal”, while tipping a few too many while on that “furlough” waiting for their tankers to be charged up with toxic oil so they could set sail asleep at the wheel on “auto-pilot”, that hopefully had been calibrated before send off! Wow, how convenient a trap, had Hannibal been successful in drafting a guy like Radio Ralf to help retaliate? The ultimate “Buffalo Bill”! As this sabotage could take place after a tanker left port and had maneuvered through the “Narrows”. For a competent radio flyer, a 30-mile hijacking would be an easy take down. And in the darkness of a nighttime passage through the “Sound”, with few and far between “lighted” navigational warnings of imminent hazards ahead? No, never could it happen I was falling to a “conspiracy” impairment, as the U.S. Coast Guard was “on guard” to follow those oil laden tankers through the “Narrows” and with its “Extended Reach Radar” an expensive undertaking courtesy the American Taxpayers, the watch could follow the “Asleep at the wheel” Captain Joe way past “Bligh Reef Island” and then it was “open ocean” sober up time. Yet, this “Man Den” had a whole lot of opportunity to “wreck-havoc”, along with the knowledge to perform such an undertaking to undermine things. And then on another day not to long after that, I just happened to be passing Ralf’s place and slowed enough to see the Radio Man had company, congregated in his drive and shooting the “breeze” - it was Hamel Hannibal and the DEC cop! My first thoughts, our worst nightmare! And then a little time later down the road, sober Joe Hazelwood’s fully laden EXXON Valdez went off course, hitting the best-known navigational hazard in the “Sound”, Bligh Reef. As there was not a better crew to target in cover-up, based on Hazelwood’s past performance in abusing alcohol. Along with a crew that was late getting back to the ship in a hurried send-off and of course, late at night in darkness and when that U.S. Coast Guard’s “Extended Reach” went into fail mode, so would EXXON find its fate on Hamel Hannibal’s radar. The rest was history, and the true “Silence of the Lambs” has been so successful in…ever wonder why Joe and EXXON got off the hook with only a slap on the wrist? And maybe, just maybe Charles “Chuck” Hamel getting away with successfully planting the seed upon which flourished this environmental disaster of March 24th, 1989! Well maybe this image fits the realization what it was all about:

“KILLING MUST FEEL GOOD TO GOD, TOO. HE DOES IT ALL THE TIME.

And did not Hannibal Lecter escape solitary confinement never to be heard of again? For Hamel it is RIP, when on April 9th in 2015 that “April Fools” came a little behind schedule. I ask, do we “Rest In Peace” the outcome of that “Wreck”? Let me invite what may help as an answer this fascination, that stubborn oil lingers on in the “Sound” in “solitary confinement” please do not disturb the shoreline of “Green Island”, so we are victims held in “Solitary Confinement”. As the “Truth” has never been revealed as to why Joe Hazelwood tested “Negative Under the Influence” when the cops first arrived on the scene of the crime, aboard the helm of the ill-fated EXXON Valdez all the while a toxic soup escaping through a ruptured hull that amazed the world - just how fast was Joe going before “Hard Aground”? Yes that first test by a fish and wildlife officer pulling double duty as a warden and cop, the “negative” results never used as that test was with oversight from the DEC, a guy that was on Hamel Hannibal’s calling card just like the “sphinx moth”. I hear the “squeaking”, take that back the “squealing” is still loud and clear today. The “Wreck”, it was “Sabotage”, just ask Radio Ralf!

Hey Morgan, Seen Henry Murray?


Hey Morgan, hey Morgan, got your ears on, hey Morgan! See, my psychedelic psycho-pathetic personality keeps reaching out, in search of an answer only you can provide. I was given your name by Kathy Carr, once-upon-a-time the Alyeska HR person in charge of misinformation, so by reaching out no intent to disrupt your peace and quiet. Just hoping you can help, shed some light on an ancient wound that still aches. And that contact information was approved by James P. Hermiller, once-upon-a-time the 5th Floor Bragaw “Houdini” who tried to correct the “misinformation” through a 3-cent apology for what was said by some, but it did not go far enough, it did not disappear - so I am reaching out to you now that you have completed that PHD. Did not want to bother you during that journey and just read one of your “Wet Papers”, I guess “white” is a thug of the past! But congrats on that lollapalooza PHD, I never got that far in education, but was ordained as a bonafide member in the “Dead Authors Club” chaired by Charles Bukowski. No honorary sheepskin for this honor, just my initials carved into the bar stool at a dive in Boston. See, life after Alyeska I had to whore my experiences out to the lowest bidder, so it meant traveling far from my growing kids - it sucked. Too bad it didn’t work out staying in Alaska. Anyhow, according to Kate it was your decision to send me back to “Pipeline Basic Training” after over 11-years of honorary and distinguished service with awards to boot I boast! I mean, I mean…can we compare “performance appraisals” from the 80s, just so I can see how I stack up to you and that Phineas J. Whoopee cushion PHD? See, how in hell did I advance from a Technician I to a Technician Level VI in less then a year and voted in as a “Lead Instrumentation Technician” and a “Lead SCADA/Measurement Technician” along with the responsibility for training a crew of 4-dedicated pump station technicians for that “Owner Company Custody Transfer” obligation when I was not even qualified! As when I received your invitation in 91 to join the new hires, that was testament somebody in the organization questioned my credentials - after all those years. Starting all over again! Now Kate said that was your call, yet it still bugs me because that would be the catalyst my demise of my career with Uncle Al. I know this was a long time ago, but this is for a book I am writing for a Boy Scout “Merit Badge". Was this “call” something to do with your PHD “thesis” like in a “Henry Murray” human experiment wherein I was the guinea pig - oink me oink me squeal like a pig? Henry who? The guy that gave us Ted Kaczynski! Anyhow, how come you made that call, for me to attend “Basic Training” again, as that was not fair by any stretch of the imagination for any reason. Especially when you forgot to tell me the class was cancelled, according to Kate so misinformed! Seems everybody ducking and pointing fingers, corporate schmoosing. Too bad Mike Jenne wasn’t still around when you made that decision to see to it I could get another “Technician Diploma”. I think he maybe would have sent you to the back of the Bozo Bus. I know working on a PHD is time consuming and takes priority, so I accept…no I don’t. When I went to the “Basic Training” back in 1979 at Pump Station#5, I was the “Top Achiever” and finished a few days early and was asked by the instructors to help those struggling to get all the tasks completed on time. Now Chris Alexander was my partner, and he didn’t have to renew his “Basic Training” credentials some years after the fact, so what gives? OK, he was the son of Two-Chairs. But what was really demeaning not to me, when I arrived at Anchorage to attend that “Basic Training” you supposedly scheduled in 1991, it was rather embarrassing because the instructor would not allow the class to continue on with my presence. I felt left-out! OK, Kate said the class was cancelled, that was a half-wracked truth as it was but for the fact the instructor refused to continue the class with me sitting in the audience, not as an auditor but as a “student”, that we got to play hooky. So I stayed around the campus feeling like a new hire with a future and learned how to change the “shit bags”, as that was my first job after attending that “Basic Training” and then back on shift - changing a freak’n shit-bag, wow a promotion. Let me ask, how many “shit-bags” did you get to change during your career with Alyeska? Better yet, how many other SCADA Technicians have had such an opportunity? It looks great on a resume. See, I was no longer a SCADA guy when that class was scheduled, thanks! I was a walking Eunuch - “man without a country job”. So I was a little confused, especially when it was “bring daddy to school” gig, so you can entertain the other kids what you do on that “Pipeline”: I change the shit-bags! Anyway, for some reason the Alyeska President went involved in why I was sent to detention, not because of any complaints from me, so something went haywire when I was sent to that detention detail…So I’s a little mixed up, was it he or she that made this decision, because this was the end of my career, so just trying to find out who fucked me over and maybe have some light shed on the reason, as I never thought that doing the best job possible that “shit-bag” politics would get in the way of righteousness. Hey, did you learn how to change a “shit-bag” when you were working on that PHD? Hope all is well, wow a PHD. Sorry I have to leave this writing, as Charles is at the bar, and that bar is a much higher goal-post then any fucking bar that PHD could ever beckon the foolishness to send me back to “basic training” and break a good…please fill in the blanks!

My “Alyeska” Back Pages - Bigotry & Prejudice Alive and Well 800-miles Long!


In 1965 at the Newport Folk Festival, Bob Dylan sounded out aloud about a “Maggie’s Farm” culture and it was in the same timeframe wherein “My Back Pages” found fame. From my testament working for Alyeska, that “Maggie’s Farm” song would ring true, a rude awakening midol operandi of the Bragaw Street brats’ “Mismanagement Mindset Menstrual Mentality”. That would one day “too soon” succeed in exhausting away the good will of the “Pipeline People” and weaken to smithereens an obligation, and that one day commenced to allow a drunk Captain Joe back aboard his EXXON Valdez…the rest is history. Yes, that “Wreck of 89” was Alyeska’s “fault” and fruit of your labor - as in the “organized labor” busting racket. Had Alyeska been “Unionized” in Valdez, that “Wreck” would still be but for a worst-case scenario for practice recon drills only. If you so choose to deny that fact you were deceived and besieged, by a corporate culture that also thought it was building bridges against “half-wracked prejudice”. Yes, denial sucks, especially when the “golden handcuffs” supported that mentality to fruition. I stayed with Alyeska during these trying times, always working against the grain in hopes this one individual could change that destructive mentality. I didn’t lose, even when I was forced to “quit” after refusing to change the pump station “shit bag” after 11-years of “Exceeds Expectations” in performance. On my anniversary, the audacity of the station supervisor demanding I “eat shit”, what a celebratory piece of cake! So I was sent back to “Basic Training”, because I did not learn the rules of the road with respect to “bigotry & prejudice” when I attended that school many years back. Get the point with that “respect”, as that is what Alyeska was all about, a corporate culture respecting “bigotry & prejudice” in the workplace. Look, the “Wreck” is testament that Alyeska set its sights on the wrong damn targets - the dedicated workers trying to make a difference. But what can one really expect, as at the same time a company maturing as one that condoned “bigotry” and condoned “threats” to dedicated quality control inspectors that were warned their next career move would be through an open hatch of an airborne helicopter, for refusing to sign off on compromising structural integrity issues. Yes “Maggie’s Farm” was here to stay with Alyeska in that “Shoot the Messenger and Kill the UNION”. My first day on the job back in 1979, I saw “bigotry” firsthand when some punk kid of a 5th Floor Bragaw “muckety muck” protested over being partnered up with an “Alaskan Native”. This was at “Basic Training” up at Pump Station#5 and instead of the instructor sending the bigot to the unemployment line…I felt sorry for Frank the Athabaskan. And I was the guy that ended up with this punk kid the sonny-boy bigot of some fat ass manager with a southern drool that carried around a “bible” for protestant protection. Funny, that my partner never attended any of the training classes and when graduation came, he was given his “Station” assignment? WTF! Everybody that had spent the last 2-weeks 15-hour days “brain storming” to struggle through all the required training modules, dumfounded that this constant “No Show” was given a “Pipeline Technician” diploma! And over the years we all would come to understand who this punk was, preferential daddy treatment his entire career with Uncle Al. I would become friends with Frank the Athabaskan, as he was assigned to the Valdez “I&E” detail. Wow, did the bigots loose out, as Frank was a very gifted individual - with a special kind-heartedness and braveheart associated character, a few and far between aspect in homo sapien qualities this day and age. Yes braveheart, as putting up with “bigotry” in life, it makes an individual a stronger human being.  I was cherished and honored to have had the opportunity to be friends with this Athabaskan - and he had one hell of a smoked salmon curing recipe handed down through the generations, which he shared with me. He rests in peace this day. But the “bigotry” didn’t end there with that single incident, so conveniently shoved under the rug by the rats. I also witnessed a similar unabated ugliness down in Valdez, screaming that way with the oil, like a benzene carcinogen in cancer from the “pipeline”. When rejected “pipeline managers” were reassigned to the END of the line. There was this cantankerous feisty old fart of an operator that nobody liked working with, up at the OM&S office. He would come on shift and place all the “process controllers” in manual to purposely produce smoke signals out of the John Zink “stacks”. Then to prevent this new-hire new kid on the block from intervening to STOP this negligence designed to recklessly pollute the air, well a newly hired black kid that wanted to do his job, Mr. Bigot Bob would write “NO NIGGERS” on the Control Room chalk board. Yes, it was 1982 and this was well known to the Alyeska management, but nothing ever done about it. For some reason, the local Alyeska management - the pipeline rejects out to pasture in Valdez so don’t rock the boat - yes don’t make waves just let that retirement fund for future fun stack up. Alyeska had become a testing grounds for re-writing the corporate mentality on how to silence troublemakers. Same scenario with the drunk tanker crews returning from shore-side furlough that couldn’t walk a straight line. Yes, a few bad apples here and there. And the sad fact of the matter, what should have and could have been done to STOP it, neglected. Why so, because Alyeska’s 5th Floor Bragaw transformed into the Filth Floor Bragaw and had its posse of wannabe corporate climbing dweebs and poster child Bills, beggar’s banquet, and instead of addressing the “Real McCoy” problems the “dweebs” instead wasted resources to attack guys like myself, because we decided on a face off on things like drunks and bigots. For real, when the chalk board in the Vapor Recovery Control Room advertised “No NIGGERS” in big “white letters” of chalk, I refused to work on any control problems as I refused to work with Bigot Bob. And when those “smoke signals” alarmed the residents across the bay in the City of Valdez and the DEC received complaints and then Alyeska was being confronted with a barrage of calls from angry citizens, well “Missing Finger” Larry came a begging to me for help to get things back in control, I told him to get fucked in sign language - I did not give a rat’s ass about it until that “Bigot” was off-shift. And I knew Larry could not give me that middle finger back! And Lynn McArthur had my back and was “with us in solidarity”. So for days on end, same old smoke signals 0600 to 1800.  This is how Alyeska handled things, and why the scar of the EXXON Valdez lives on forevermore a stain upon a once good culture choked by an ass kissing mentality and “golden boys” that would do anything and everything to please the “Executive” cesspool - that 5th Floor Bragaw. I spent time up there, in David “Pitchfork” Pritchard’s office voicing my concerns, the whiff of “Fromunder” always present. The funny time is when Pritchard found a “surveillance bug” in his office, as he was about the only Alyeska President that wanted to change that gone astray “culture”. Those Alyeska managers, the corporate “whores”, they know who I am talking about and is that retirement worth it? As that bastard oil still lingers on killing once living things in the “Sound” and it all could have and should have been avoided, but hiding the truth of what’s the matter and holding on to that fantasy that “Management” gives a rat’s ass, why bother to speak up as keep thou peace this “cashist of cash cows” handout, which seemed to allow George Mucous Nelson to thrive and continue to shit and ejaculate on humanity, so who really gave a fuck about “black boys on mopeds”!

Half-wracked prejudice leaped forth, "rip down all hate, " I screamed
Lies that life is black and white spoke from my skull, I dreamed
Romantic facts of musketeers foundationed deep, somehow
Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now - B. Dylan